One Whole Year

It’s almost the new year, time to make a resolution, or resolutions, if you so desire. It’s time to look back on the last year and reflect on what you may or not have accomplished and discern how you stacked up to the previous year. Before raising that midnight toast and flipping the calendar, will you make a new list and welcome the new year?

I actually gave up on making resolutions a few years ago. By March 1st I would forget what I wrote down or scratch some things off my list and add new things I wanted to change about my life. I didn’t like trying to keep up so I traded in my list for one word. A one word focus seemed more realistic. Now I choose one word and give myself 365 days to improve upon its meaning in my life.

For 2019, I am choosing the word WHOLE. One definition of “whole” says it means, “unbroken or undamaged.” A little too late for that one with my life experiences. I have been beautifully broken and (try to) embrace my flaws (most of the time); these are the things that created my character and I have to love them for that. I will be using the synonymous definitions of whole which are; complete, full, unabridged and uncut. This means “look out world, here I come! The complete, full, unabridged and uncut version of me is about to be unleashed!”

My friend Mary, who follows my one word resolution practice, recently wrote on social media: “I feel like there is a panther inside of me who has been biding her time, but is done incubating. 2019 is more of a mantra - do it afraid. I have nothing to lose - this year, I will do it afraid. No limits not set by God. Insecurities will bow. I'm loved wherever I go. Fear is just stupid. What a dumb adversary. Love on and do it afraid”. I absolutely LOVE this. Her thoughts echo mine completely.

I recently signed up to be part of a seven day blessing mediation for the new year. It is being lead by three Tibetan Monks. One of them shared these words of inspiration in preparation:

“How do we bless the world? By taking the initiative to be a Love Radiator, one person at a time. We have one universal goal; to turn around the rising tide of disconnection in the world and, through renewed peace and love, reconnect to what truly matters to us.”
-Master Chunyi Lin

Taking the initiative to be a Love Radiator will bless the world. This is all I really want to do while I am living. Master Lin describes this in a profound, yet simple manner. “To turn around the rising tide of disconnection in the world and, through renewed peace and love, reconnect to what truly matters to us.” I cannot do this unless (or until) I am the person I want to become; the complete, full, unabridged, uncut version of me that is done incubating and biding her time. Being a Love Radiator has to start with me and this is where things will change. As my friend Mary stated, there can be no fears, no limits, no insecurities.

Looking back on past years, these are the things that I have allowed to hold me hostage in my past. I have not embraced my God given gifts and have not whole-heartedly shared them with the world. I cannot be a radiator if I am not willing to share. A radiator is that object in the room radiating its warmth that fills an entire room. You can’t see what it is doing, but you can feel it. You can especially feel it when you are near and then once you know the source, you can take that knowing with you to other rooms and go in search of the radiator there.

“Like the sun, we are attracted to people who shine with warmth and brightness.”
-Anthony Douglas Williams

In 2019, I want to be whole. I want to reconnect to what really matters to me. Master Lin and my friend Mary have both inspired me to be true to myself and make this my resolution. I have to take the initiative, I have to let go of fear and insecurities and be limitless. In order to be whole, I have to be free of these things and let my light shine. Being incomplete is an antonym for being whole. I have been this way for far too long. I don’t believe I will be 100% complete until I meet our Creator again, but in the meantime, I can work towards being more whole and less incomplete.

“Nothing can dim the light that shines from within.” -Maya Angelou

I don’t know exactly what this will look like. I do know that I am going to embrace and welcome the new year and believe without a shadow of a doubt that the best is truly yet to come.

“There are far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” -C.S. Lewis

May 2019 be abundant, blessed and filled with everything your hearts desire.
Happy New Year!