I just returned from my tenth year of participating in Wreaths Across America at Arlington National Cemetery. To honor all who have served our country and died, a Christmas wreath is placed on their graves at more than 1600 national cemeteries across all fifty states. The wreaths adorn these hallowed grounds for an entire month, adding seasonal color and a spirit of giving and remembrance to the rows of white tablets.
When I first began attending Wreaths Across America in 2009, a few thousand people would show up to help cover the cemetery. The crowd has grown significantly since then and has seen an average of 50,000 - 70,000 people! The weather has had zero effect on whether or not anyone gets a wreath. In fact, two years ago, freezing rain covered the cemetery in slippery grass and frozen puddles. This year, the 50 degree temperature kept the rain from freezing, but it fell steady all day, saturating the ground and soaking the 60,000+ people that still showed up! Many sections were flooded and muddy, making for miserable walking conditions.
In each of the years where the weather presented a challenge, I reminded myself of the sacrifice the men and women whose names are etched on the stones made time and time again. The weather never kept them from giving of themselves for me. The sight of every stone having a lovingly placed fresh balsam wreath tied with a red, felt ribbon is something to behold. Being wet or cold pales in comparison to the sacrifices made for me. The beauty of seeing every man and woman honored with my own eyes is incredibly heartwarming.
“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful”. -Norman Vincent Peale
Wreaths Across America is a tradition for many. Families come year after year to remember, honor and teach about those who served our country and died. People come from all over the country to honor their loved ones laid to rest in these national cemeteries. Some people don’t have relatives laid to rest here, they simply have hearts as big as the moon and serve the families that do. My friend Jennifer is one of these people. I first met her seven years ago when I traveled with the convoy delivering the wreaths from Maine to Arlington. She lives several hours away in North Carolina, yet makes the trip more than once a year to honor the fallen and their families. She came to know my son Ben through me as I introduced her to him at his resting place in section 60. We instantly connected.
Jennifer faithfully participates in the placing of and the clean up of the wreaths every year. We have been friends since we met and stay in contact year round. I discovered that Jennifer is an “ambassador” to those who cannot make the trip like she does. She collects requests and then takes a picture of the wreath at the grave and sends it to the person requesting. I happen to know that this year she made her way to more than 100 graves at Arlington, honoring each of those names and their loved ones who couldn’t be there.
A couple weeks before WAA day, Jennifer asked me if I had a copy of Ben’s handwriting or signature. I obliged without question and sent something to her. I knew she could only be up to something good - that’s her nature. After we met up in Arlington, she gave me a small gift box. Inside the box were two white Christmas bulbs with Ben’s handwriting on both sides. One was his signature, the other was his signature from a letter he had written to me that said, “Love you. Ben”. She gave me TWO - one for me and one for my dad. My eyes watered as I hugged and thanked her. This is by far one of the most thoughtful gifts I have ever received. Thank you, Jennifer. You are truly an angel on earth.
“Maybe Christmas, the Grinch thought, doesn't come from a store”. -Dr. Seuss
When I know my travel plans to Washington, DC, I let my donor family advocate know I am coming. This is the person who has supported me as the mother of someone who donated their organs. My son donated his organs upon his death in Washington DC at Walter Reed Army Medical Center. I have returned to the Medical Intensive Care Unit multiple times over the past nine years to share my story with the staff and enlighten them to my feelings about being the mother of an organ donor. This time was no exception.
My advocate, a hospital coordinator and I informally addressed the nursing staff during a shift change at the nurses station in three locations. As I wrapped up my story at the second station, one of the gentleman interrupted and asked me if he could ask a question. He had a reflective look on his face, as if he was recalling something. He wanted to know if Ben's heart went to a female. I told him it did. He told me that he had taken care of Ben. When we shared more detail about Ben’s story, I remembered him. I remembered his kindness and care of Ben. He had bathed Ben and covered him with a patriotic blanket after it was determined he was brain dead. His level of care changed to preparing him to save other lives instead of trying to save his. The transformation of the way Ben looked was significant. His appearance was peaceful and he looked more like the handsome young man I last saw two months prior. The nurse I had just encountered was a reminder of this moment. We hugged as tears filled our eyes.
Nine years later, this was a gift. A gift I never saw coming, that touched me deeply. How this man and I ended up face to face again can only be explained by something greater than both of us. If you ask me, it was Ben’s Christmas present to me, a special present that connected two hearts again, two hearts that cared for his, and, although, in very different ways, continue to reflect on the impact he had on our lives. This was the spirit of Christmas at it’s very best. The spirit of Christmas which always begins in the heart. It is alive and well in Jennifer’s heart and alive and well in a nurse who shows up every day to care for the hearts of those who may not see another Christmas.
“Christmas is a season not only of rejoicing but of reflection”. -Winston Churchill
Rejoice: be joyful, be happy, be euphoric, be overjoyed, be jubilant, be in raptures, celebrate, make merry, take delight in, find joy in, enjoy, revel in, glory in, delight in, savor.
May your Christmas be filled with the rejoicing of this beautiful season of giving and remembrance.
Wishing all of you a Merry Christmas and an abundantly blessed New Year.
Again this is beautiful!! I love it!!